rain, i do not like you.

may showers, please, go away.

i want sunshine

and summer

sno cones and warmth!

i can't handle the dreary days anymore.

my winter coats and sweaters are supposed to be locked away,

not worn every day.

may showers, please, go away.

Make thee an ark of gopher wood...

I feel like I'm going to need one come Saturday when Chris and I are in Arkansas.

It has been raining...raining...and raining.

Roads are washed out, rivers are up, people are being evacuated.

This is at a park by my house.

These are usually nice little falls that you can walk up.

Now it looks more like a white water rafting adventure.

Oh, and did I mention tornadoes?

Several people have died and the storms are still coming. Please keep everyone enduring these storms in your prayers.

takin it back: film

i love everything about photos.

i love capturing the moment.

candid smiles, laughs.

i am going to spend my summer learning as much as i can.

i want to shoot for me.

luckily, i have someone by my side to share in this experience.

chris and i took our old slrs out for a little fun.

here ya go.

Home, I'm coming...

In 22 days I'll be in Arkansas.
It will have been one year since I've been able to say that.
I can't express how excited I am.
Not only am I going home,
but Chris is going with me.
I think I'm even more excited for that.
I can't wait to go here, here, here, then here!
And of course many more places.
Gah...hurry.

home away from home

Even though it's hard being away from home, family and friends, seeing beauty like this makes it a little easier. How one could ever doubt a higher power I'll never know...

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Festival of Colors at the Sri Sri Radha Hare Krishna Temple

The Hindus in Spanish Fork, Utah sure know how to let the Mormon kids have a good time.

I can't get enough of her

word of the day

fugacious

\ fyoo-GAY-shuhs \ , adjective;

1.

Lasting but a short time; fleeting.

Acceptance

I have came further than most will ever know. I don't divulge things from my past, even though sometimes I think it would be easier. Easier if people knew the trials I've had to face and continue to overcome. Knowing that I really am happy though sometimes I may get down about things. This journey has only just begun, and I am proud of where I am in life. Where I'm going will only get better as long as I remember to breathe and take it all in a day at a time.

summer, come sooner

As the days go from warm to cold it does nothing but tease me.
Is it necessary to tug at my emotions this way?

I need sunshine, summertime and everything that entails.

Soon.

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Thoughts on a Sunday

Lately I've been thinking about what all has led me to where I am now.

I look back on all of my past relationships and mistakes;

some of those relationships that were indeed,

mistakes.

It's crazy to think about how everything you go through molds you into the person you are

today.

I wouldn't take back anything I've been through because each event or trial has led me to

where I am now.

I've been given heartaches and happiness to help me connect with different people on so many levels.

Sometimes things overwhelm me, true,

but when I stop and look at how far I've came I can breathe.

I know that I couldn't have dealt with any of this had it not been for my decision to become a

Latter-day Saint.

It's been almost 5 years now since I was baptized, and I'm still learning and growing on a daily basis.

I wish my friends and family could understand the happiness I feel because

I have built an amazing, strong testimony.

The things I continue to learn only push me to be a better person.

I know that through the Gospel and Atonement of Jesus Christ I can use my

strengths and weaknesses to help others.

No one should ever feel as though they don't deserve happiness just because of something from their past.

Accept everything you've went through in life for what it is, good or bad,

and use it to become who you want to be.

You're not given trials to get you down.

Trials are chosen for you because you have the ability and strength to overcome them.

song of the day

word of the day.

bra·zen   [brey-zuhn]

–adjective
1.
shameless or impudent: brazen presumption.
2.
made of brass.
3.
like brass, as in sound, color, or strength.

–verb (used with object)
4.
to make brazen or bold.

—verb phrase
5.
brazen out / through, to face boldly or shamelessly: He prefers to brazen it out rather than admit defeat.

I'm wide awake, it's morning

A little somethin for a cold Wednesday...

always coca-cola

i used to hate coca-cola, especially diet coke.

then i met ashton, who influenced me to become addicted to the diet stuff.

i still hated coke.

i was solely a diet coke or dr.pepper girl.

then i met someone who loves coke.

we would always share drinks, and i pretended to like it.

then one day...i did.

now i always want it.

always.

want know the way to my heart?

a cold coca-cola and a maple bar.

the end.

photo courtesy of xan hart

sleep? who needs it...

sitting here, unable to sleep.

isn't it funny how sometimes you try to get away from something,

then that's the only thing you want?

i yearn for home.

i'm not wanting to move back there,

but i want to be there.

i want to see my family,

especially the new addition.

i want to see my sister.

she is so gorgeous.

a bonafide rarity.

i want to see her grow up.

help her make the right decisions.

i want to lie on the grass and soak up the southern air.

when it's warm.

life has given me amazing opportunities,

and i wouldn't trade them for much...

just for arkansas to be a little closer to utah.

photo courtesy of xan hart

remember when i made a friend...

...and then he decided he wanted to leave me in a couple months.

rude.

luckily, i love him nonetheless...so this is for him.

november...really?

i was asked by a friend why i don't update this thing anymore.

so here goes...

have you ever had one of those moments when you wonder what you're doing?

and you feel as though you have no control?

that's where i am.

was.

but i realized i've got more control than i thought i did.

even though i'm 24 and feel like i've accomplished just about nothing...i have.

i've been on my own, 1400 miles from any family, doing my best

to make it.

to give myself more opportunities.

to make my momma proud and realize she did better at raising me than she thinks.

to live life, make mistakes and get my heart broken.

because all of these things make me stronger and stronger day by day.

this past year couldn't have been more difficult,

but i've came farther than i would've ever imagined.

so many times i held myself back from being happy or experiencing new things just because i wanted to keep myself safe.

but you can't do that.

granted it's a lot easier to not get hurt,

but whether it be a breakup, school or a job, even if it fails...

the experience is worth it and you can still go on.

i've learned to try pushing myself to the limit

even when i don't think i can go any further.

let yourself live life.

a little heart break and trial will only make you a better person in the end

that's all.

6:22

I feel like I'm at a standstill.
I have things I want to do, but doing them means letting go...
I'm not sure how to do that.
I know I can, though. I've done it before.
One foot in front of the other, I guess.
It's all overwhelming, but I know I just have to do it.
I can't wait for things to happen anymore.
I have to be proactive in deciding what I want for my life.
I feel like I've came a long way, and I'm not stopping.
At times I get really down thinking about things I have to overcome,
but all of these trials are just making me stronger.
I'm very aware that I'm not given anything I can't handle,
no matter how difficult something might seem.
I can do this.