I feel like I'm at a standstill.
I have things I want to do, but doing them means letting go...
I'm not sure how to do that.
I know I can, though. I've done it before.
One foot in front of the other, I guess.
It's all overwhelming, but I know I just have to do it.
I can't wait for things to happen anymore.
I have to be proactive in deciding what I want for my life.
I feel like I've came a long way, and I'm not stopping.
At times I get really down thinking about things I have to overcome,
but all of these trials are just making me stronger.
I'm very aware that I'm not given anything I can't handle,
no matter how difficult something might seem.
I can do this.
Today
I have to constantly be reminded of how blessed I am.
It's not always easy seeing the positive in your own life,
but luckily I have people to point it out.
I am continually working on myself...even if it doesn't seem like it.
I have someone in my life whom helps me more than he'll ever understand,
and even if he doesn't stick around as long as I'd like...
It was all well worth it.
I am ready to stop letting the things of my past,
things I can't control,
determine what my future has in store for me.
My worst enemy is myself these days, and only I can push through
the fear and overcome all of this.
There is no fear in love; but perfect love casteth out fear: because fear hath torment. He that feareth is not made perfect in love.
1 John 4:18
It's not always easy seeing the positive in your own life,
but luckily I have people to point it out.
I am continually working on myself...even if it doesn't seem like it.
I have someone in my life whom helps me more than he'll ever understand,
and even if he doesn't stick around as long as I'd like...
It was all well worth it.
I am ready to stop letting the things of my past,
things I can't control,
determine what my future has in store for me.
My worst enemy is myself these days, and only I can push through
the fear and overcome all of this.
There is no fear in love; but perfect love casteth out fear: because fear hath torment. He that feareth is not made perfect in love.
1 John 4:18
courtesy of modest mouse
sometimes all i really want to feel is love
sometimes i'm angry that i feel so angry
sometimes my feelings get in the way
of what i really feel i needed to say...
sometimes i'm angry that i feel so angry
sometimes my feelings get in the way
of what i really feel i needed to say...
Light up, light up
This is probably the closest I've ever been to thinking it was the end of the world.
Quite surreal...and absolutely amazing.
It's not every night you look out your window and see this...
Meteor the size of oven lights up the night sky, alarms Utahns
Quite surreal...and absolutely amazing.
It's not every night you look out your window and see this...
Meteor the size of oven lights up the night sky, alarms Utahns
let the wild rumpus start!
i believe everyone needs to take a moment amidst the everyday chaos to reflect on the simpler times. you know, when you were a kid with no cares in the world. when all you had to get up for was to ride your bike or maybe make a fort in the woods.
that's what i did anyways.
see, sometimes you forget about these things...and that's why they make movies like "where the wild things are". everyone has read the book at some point or another. and if not, well, you should.
while watching it i was frozen in that moment, forgetting any problems that might be engulfing my life.
for lack of better words it was...nostalgic.
i want to see it again...and again...and again.
so, take a gander at what i'm talking about...here
thanks and goodbye.
that's what i did anyways.
see, sometimes you forget about these things...and that's why they make movies like "where the wild things are". everyone has read the book at some point or another. and if not, well, you should.
while watching it i was frozen in that moment, forgetting any problems that might be engulfing my life.
for lack of better words it was...nostalgic.
i want to see it again...and again...and again.
so, take a gander at what i'm talking about...here
thanks and goodbye.
Life.
Life deals you certain cards,
and you may not always have the best hand.
You can stay where you are
And be on the safe side.
You can fold and give up
Always wondering what could have been.
Or you can go all in
Hoping that everything will work out.
I've chosen to go all in.
I'm not sure where I'll end up
But I know it will be okay.
I don't want to look back and regret.
I am taking the hand I have been dealt
And I'm not going to give up.
and you may not always have the best hand.
You can stay where you are
And be on the safe side.
You can fold and give up
Always wondering what could have been.
Or you can go all in
Hoping that everything will work out.
I've chosen to go all in.
I'm not sure where I'll end up
But I know it will be okay.
I don't want to look back and regret.
I am taking the hand I have been dealt
And I'm not going to give up.
a break from reality
fayetteville public library
two best friends
one pseudo-mom
three puppies
herbal teas
a pool
the sun
no cares at all
this is what i needed
two best friends
one pseudo-mom
three puppies
herbal teas
a pool
the sun
no cares at all
this is what i needed
overjoyed
it's amazing to me how in the midst of uncertainty you can feel at peace.
i have no idea what my future holds, but i'm okay with that.
i have been blessed with a fairly good life despite a couple minor details. i know that it will only get better, and i'm looking forward to every step along the way.
i've recently had the chance to travel, and i have another trip coming up.
life is gooooood.
i have no idea what my future holds, but i'm okay with that.
i have been blessed with a fairly good life despite a couple minor details. i know that it will only get better, and i'm looking forward to every step along the way.
i've recently had the chance to travel, and i have another trip coming up.
life is gooooood.
heaven on a rock = hawai'i
i just returned from a week long get-a-way in hawai'i.
it was glorious.
you should go.
go on over here for fotos from de trip.
enjoi.
it was glorious.
you should go.
go on over here for fotos from de trip.
enjoi.
How many skeletons do you have in your closet?
I always thought Lifetime movies were silly.
Children meeting their families after not knowing them their entire lives.
Couples finding out they're really related and were somehow separated by some family feud 20 years earlier.
Family members dying only to unfold a web of secrets and lies.
People you thought were perfect turning out to have their own skeletons no one was aware of.
Yeah, I thought all of these stories were all the same and very unrealistic.
Until I found out that my life could very well be a Lifetime movie.
Children meeting their families after not knowing them their entire lives.
Couples finding out they're really related and were somehow separated by some family feud 20 years earlier.
Family members dying only to unfold a web of secrets and lies.
People you thought were perfect turning out to have their own skeletons no one was aware of.
Yeah, I thought all of these stories were all the same and very unrealistic.
Until I found out that my life could very well be a Lifetime movie.
Summertime and Livin' is Easy
I've decided that life isn't as bad as I might have made it out to be.
Of course, I am still in Arkansas and not Utah...
but I'm going to make the most of it.
I recently got a job working at Discovery Island Learning Center.
I have a class of 12...3 year olds.
It is one of the most rewarding things I've encountered.
I love them.
Also, I've been reading a lot lately.
I was never one to read.
Ever.
At all.
I started reading to try and help myself sleep at night.
(since usually reading makes me tired)
Well, it has only helped me to nearly finish 1 book a night.
So far I have read:
Go Ask Alice
For One More Day
Dear Diary
I am currently working on:
Wuthering Heights
Driving With Dead People
A Portrait of the Artist as a Young Man
Now I spend most days at Barnes & Noble.
To top off everything I am going to Hawaii.
I'll keep everyone posted on that adventure as it comes.
Life is not at all what you may expect it to be,
but stay faithful.
It will all work out probably better than you first imagined.
Of course, I am still in Arkansas and not Utah...
but I'm going to make the most of it.
I recently got a job working at Discovery Island Learning Center.
I have a class of 12...3 year olds.
It is one of the most rewarding things I've encountered.
I love them.
Also, I've been reading a lot lately.
I was never one to read.
Ever.
At all.
I started reading to try and help myself sleep at night.
(since usually reading makes me tired)
Well, it has only helped me to nearly finish 1 book a night.
So far I have read:
Go Ask Alice
For One More Day
Dear Diary
I am currently working on:
Wuthering Heights
Driving With Dead People
A Portrait of the Artist as a Young Man
Now I spend most days at Barnes & Noble.
To top off everything I am going to Hawaii.
I'll keep everyone posted on that adventure as it comes.
Life is not at all what you may expect it to be,
but stay faithful.
It will all work out probably better than you first imagined.
life and all it entails
I want happiness.
I want to graduate.
I want to see the world.
I want someone to love me for me.
I want a family.
I want my momma to be happy.
I want my sister to not make the mistakes I have.
I want to make a difference.
That's what I want.
That's what I'll have.
I want to graduate.
I want to see the world.
I want someone to love me for me.
I want a family.
I want my momma to be happy.
I want my sister to not make the mistakes I have.
I want to make a difference.
That's what I want.
That's what I'll have.
supercalifragilisticexpialidocious
i arrived in arkansas a little over 2 months ago,
and i'm not sure where exactly the time went.
i have yet to accomplish anything i planned on.
this. is. going. to. change.
i know what i want to do and where i want to be.
i know what i have to do to get there.
my happiness is my truest means of motivation.
i will not end up like you and yours.
and so on and so forth.
my life has a purpose,
and i'm beginning to uncover what it is.
i can't rely on anyone else.
i have myself and i can do this.
and i'm not sure where exactly the time went.
i have yet to accomplish anything i planned on.
this. is. going. to. change.
i know what i want to do and where i want to be.
i know what i have to do to get there.
my happiness is my truest means of motivation.
i will not end up like you and yours.
and so on and so forth.
my life has a purpose,
and i'm beginning to uncover what it is.
i can't rely on anyone else.
i have myself and i can do this.
to the one i miss
there is a girl that makes me laugh, cry, and want to kill someone.
she needs to come back to arkansas.
her boyfriends miss her.
she is a can crushing pro.
she also loves tractors, even if she doesn't remember.
the dance she does will make you ever so happy.
she can sing along to country songs all night.
she loves carrie and randy.
she will rock your world.
her name is alex.
she needs to come back to arkansas.
her boyfriends miss her.
she is a can crushing pro.
she also loves tractors, even if she doesn't remember.
the dance she does will make you ever so happy.
she can sing along to country songs all night.
she loves carrie and randy.
she will rock your world.
her name is alex.
cracks in the foundation
i knew i needed to come back to arkansas
even though i didn't entirely know why
since i've been here it's been rough
and i've wanted to go back to utah
i know that i still have to figure myself out
this is where so many things started
i can't run to a little bubble in utah for this one
i have to stay here and face my fear
if it doesn't kill me first
even though i didn't entirely know why
since i've been here it's been rough
and i've wanted to go back to utah
i know that i still have to figure myself out
this is where so many things started
i can't run to a little bubble in utah for this one
i have to stay here and face my fear
if it doesn't kill me first
8 months later
it's been a bumpy road,
but i'm home.
a couple slips and falls,
but i feel good about this.
but i'm home.
a couple slips and falls,
but i feel good about this.
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